Stripper Ministries...a different kind of party.

Last night I got into work a little late (I blame this on my new addiction to writing out blog posts and obsessively checking the grammar to make sure i get it right before throwing it up on the web).  Frank was pissed at me, but fuck him.  Stripping often feels like this obligatory party one must attend night after night, week after week.  You get on your party dress, have a few shots, shake your ass and your tits and pull some moves on that pole.  And that pole is my gym membership by the way.  Keeps me fit.

Anyway, Penni wasn't working with me last night and there was some bitchy new girl who just kept giving me the stink eye.  Like who is she anyway?  But I got my makeup on and got out there.  I don't know why, but Weds are crowded.  Lots of guys were out.  And I made some good cash.

But his new chick looked liked she was WORKING.  Not like she was having any kind of fun.  You know what?  No one likes a downer at the party.  You know the type...the one who stands by the chips all night long and complains.  Or who says to everyone "don't eat the blue acid".  After everyone's eaten the blue acid.

I have a good smile to go with my assets and I use everything.  Came home with good money last night too.  But I'm bored with stripping.  No, i don't go telling everyone this at work, but my friends know it.  I'm tired of going to the party and being the entertainment.  Truth is, I don't want to end up like miss Debbie Downer from last night.

I'm giving some serious thought to a side business now.  I know I keep talking about how I'm a minister with the Universal Life Church and all that...but I'm thinking of a little Las Vegas in Panama Beach.  Like Stripper Ministries or something.  Where I could run things from my apartment, marry people, offer spiritual counseling and even do baptisms.  i know.  i know.  It sounds crazy.  But before you all trot out the pitchforks...think about it.  Who would YOU rather have in your baptism photo?  A priest or a hot stripper anointing you in your baptism photo.  Let's be honest.....that picture would get a lot more mileage, wouldn't it.