ok. I'll admit it. It's hard keeping up a blog. I don't have to be at work for a few hours and it's hot as fuck out right now, so I'm pecking away at the keys now. I like this keeping a diary online bit because it does remind me, day to day, of what I think I want to do.... And what I've actually done. Yeah...
Anyway, I just found out my friend is gravely ill. and it's really thrown me for a loop. He was fine until a month ago. then he lost all this weight (like 30 lbs) and had trouble breathing. He wrote me a few emails talking about how scared he was feeling and I wrote back saying I was thinking about him and I was sure he would be fine. Then they got him to the hospital and he was put into the ICU. I didn't know this and just thought he was recuperating. I called his wife yesterday asking how he was doing and she said he'd gone to the ICU. And that he has Lou Gehrig's diesease. Fuck!
They are moving him to a hospice to die on Wed. How has this happened? This also challenges my whole approach to wanting to minister to people. I got this minister's handbook from the Universal Life Church, and in it there's a chapter on "The Minister Serves in Time of Illness, Trouble, or Sorrow."
There's this bit about what to do and say (mostly prayers) when someone is in the hospital, but it's really geared for Christians, and my friend isn't a christian. So I don't know. Perhaps the best thing I can do is visit him soon... That's so hard though, you know? But I wouldn't want to be in an hospice knowing my time was up and not say goodbye to people. It affects everyone differently though.
I feel like I should write my OWN prayers and whatnot. But I don't know if I'm a good enough writer for that sort of thing. Thinking about all of this and my friend is depressing, but it needs thinking about too.
On another note... I've decided that while I'm alive, it's time I got back out there and met some men again. I think I mentioned I was married once before, but he was killed a few years ago. I've been gun shy ever since. I know the assumption is that since I'm a stripper, dating ain't no big thing. But that's not true... We do meet a LOT of creeps though. I'm looking not to meet a creep. Maybe I'll get lucky like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman...hahaha!
What a weird day. I just hope my night isn't.
4 comments:
You are brave to share your life like this. great reading! Thanks. I'm sure your friend will appreciate your visit and friendship. And I know what you mean when you say that strippers attract creeps. I'm a stripper too and dating can really suck when you try and be serious about it. I'm going to check out this Univ. Life Church you've mentioned. If they'll have me as a minister, that'd be hilarious! LOL!
Dating sucks. But if you have to do it...find a guy who is kind as you and who isn't possessive. I love the blog Dixie. good on you girl!
I can already tell from what little I've read that you are definitely a good enough writer to write your own prayers.
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